just find the need to perhaps clear a few things out. hope you are going to read it. well, occasionally things appear in a way that is not preferrred. thats life aint it. however, those very close around me know that I don't dwell much on things I know I'll never get. yet again, they also know me as a very determined person who goes all out to achieve what I aim. but, aims are just aims and the determination level varies according to its importance & what its about. upon reading the message received, I was feeling slightly ambivalent. wasnt sure whether I should still try or to just lose hope. almost everything within told me the latter-to just lose hope & focus on the upcoming Os. & yes, i chose to follow the latter. however, love is a very sensitive issue which goes deep down ones heart. one that is loved cannot just be forgotten in a day nor can it forgotten in a week. a month, perhaps, if I'm lucky. telling myself to lose hope was difficult as I knowingly & painfully tried to erase the feeling i had for you which was inscribed within me. but i know i had to get it done soon. never would i want it to linger within me any further. at times, it was hard to resist the temptation to just send you a text, in the hope that a reply would be given. but in texting you, it really came upon me to just forget about you. sincerely, i was trying my very best to forget it. playing soccer or out to shop with the usual clique are the best ways to aid me in forgetting you. however, to add salt to the wound, boss seemed to have acted in a way that might have been seen as if it was me who had instigated him to act in that manner, with all the questions asked and remarks passed it may have been obvious as if it was me who had instigated boss to act in that manner. but, to tell you, i had not instigated boss to act in the way he did. some may say this is a common line, but I sincerely respected your decision & did not carry on futher in the ever competitive race to win you over. once again, it wasnt me who had instigated boss to act in that manner. calling me a jerk& all seems all-so-fitting for a moment of time yet again, i realised, that i wasn't behind boss' actions. i had not asked him to act on my behalf. let it be known that boss acted on his own will. clearly boss' actions had tarnished your impression of me, but, im not blaming him. & there's only one thing I can do which is to apologise to you. I'm so sorry that all these things had to happen! Never did I expect things to get this extreme. Yet again i wish to clarify as it is of utmost importance: I had not instigated boss to act in the manner he did.
I really hope that, since we are both from the same council, we can continue to work together when the need arises. it is very important that we remain professional, not letting personal matters affect our communication in times of need.You can still ask me what are the problems that may arise once you have taken over the council(after jogathon). I'll still be there to be of assistance as you've said, I am a senior afterall.
Rest assured, I have vowed to myself, to forget how I felt for you. & I wouldn't be surprised if you had started to abhor me.
i really wish that your impression of me has improved after reading my clarification. Yours truly, Muhd Hazim Bin Rosli
*boss-Mr England King
harlow
hazims the name.thats all u should know. :) heehee
